ALL THE NEWS THAT IS NOT FIT TO PRINT.
A pretty quick window into local, life happenings and culture is to grab the daily morning paper on the way in from the airport. So it is in Cape Town where this morning's Cape Times reports a galaxy of wondrous happenings, news that is hard to come by in other climes. Sadly the Cape Times, that one-time bastion of apartheid resistance, the then newsrooms staffed by Verwoerd, Vorster and Botha's jailed editors, many of whom opted for running blank spaces where the censors scissors had been busy, has been dumbed down more than most. It is, of course, hard to blame the management in these times where, globally, electronic media is calling all the shots. In South Africa, this situation is exacerbated as editors try and try to attract the huge new and expanding, if still less educated, black readership. However this should not spoil our fun.
Here's a choice selection of stories and headlines that add a frisson of excitement to the reading of this morning's paper.
- South Africa's lone Winter Olympic skier and his coach travelled economy to wherever it was whilst five Olympic Committee officials travelled up front. The competitor came last. The officials did not ski.
- Mountain rescue vehicles turned back on the famous Chapman's Peak toll road because the driver had no coin for the toll.
- A Table Mountain bird man base-jumper to be charged because he had no licence to fly - in spite of the fact that he nearly killed himself on the way down.
- Australia approves the launch of a new confectionery bar romantically named Nucking Futs - on the grounds that the word Fucking is a part of modern Australian language. Mind you, the bar is not to be marketed to kids. As if.
- Dung Beatles Dirty Dancing helps them to Have a Ball. Apparently said beetles roll elephant wet dung into a ball before proceeding to their nest with the booty.
Can't wait for tomorrow's paper.